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."Isn't who what?""Sarah Wynn.""Who was talking about Sarah Wynn? What about documentaries?""Mr.Cloward, you would become extremely hostile if the news programs were broadcast to you.You know that.""Walter Cronkite's dead.Maybe I'd like them better now.""You don't care about the news of the real world, Mr.Cloward, do you?""No.""Then you see where we are.Not one iota of our programming is really appropriate for you.But ninety percent of it is downright harmful to you.And we can't turn the television off, because of the Solitude Act.Do you see our dilemma?""Do you see mine?""Of course, Mr.Cloward.And I sympathize completely.Make some friends, Mr.Cloward, and we'll turn off your television."And so the interview was over.For two days Cloward brooded.All the time he did, Sarah Wynn was grieving over her three-days' husband who had just been killed in a car wreck on Wilshire Boulevard, wherever the hell that was.But now the body was scarcely cold and already her old suitors were back, trying to help her, trying to push their love on her."Can't you let yourself depend on me, just a little?" asked Teddy, the handsome one with lots of money."I don't like depending on people," Sarah answered."You depended on George." George was the husband's name.The dead one."I know," she said, and cried for a moment.Sarah Wynn was good at crying.Hiram Cloward turned another page in The Brothers Karamazov."You need friends," Teddy insisted."Oh, Teddy, I know it," she said, weeping."Will you be my friend?""Who writes this stuff?" Hiram Cloward asked aloud.Maybe the Aryan in the television company offices had been right.Make some friends.Get the damn set turned off whatever the cost.He got up from his chair and went out into the corridor in the apartment building.Clearly posted on the walls were several announcements:Chess club 5-9 wedEncounter groups nightly at 7Learn to knit 6:30 bring yarn and needlesGames games games in game room (basement)Just want to chat? Friends of the Family 7:30 to 10:30 nightlyFriends of the Family? Hiram snorted.Family was his maudlin mother and her constant weeping about how hard life was and how no one in her right mind would ever be born a woman if anybody had any choice but there was no choice and marriage was a trap men sprung on women, giving them a few minutes of pleasure for a lifetime of drudgery, and I swear to God if it wasn't for my little baby Hiram I'd ditch that bastard for good, it's for your sake I don't leave, my little baby, because if I leave you'll grow up into a macho bastard like your beerbelly father.And friends? What friends ever come around when good old Dad is boozing and belting the living crap out of everybody he can get his hands on?I read.That's what I do.The Prince and the Pauper.Connecticut Yankee.Pride and Prejudice.Worlds within worlds within worlds, all so pretty and polite and funny as hell.Friends of the Family.Worth a shot, anyway.Hiram went to the elevator and descended eighteen floors to the Fun Floor.Friends of the Family were in quite a large room with alcohol at one end and soda pop at the other.Hiram was surprised to discover that the term soda pop had been revived.He walked to the cola sign and asked the woman for a Coke."How many cups of coffee have you had today?" she asked."Three.""Then I'm so sorry, but I can't give you a soda pop with caffeine in it.May I suggest Sprite?""You may not," Hiram said, clenching his teeth."We're too damn overprotected.""Exactly how I feel," said a woman standing beside him, Sprite in hand."They protect and protect and protect, and what good does it do? People still die, you know.""I suspected as much," Hiram said, struggling for a smile, wondering if his humor sounded funny or merely sarcastic.Apparently funny.The woman laughed."Oh, you're a gem, you are," she said."What do you do?""I'm a detached professor of literature at Princeton.""But how can you live here and work there?"He shrugged."I don't work there.I said detached.When the new television teaching came in, my PQ was too low.I'm not a screen personality.""So few of us are," she said sagely, nodding and smiling."Oh, how I long for the good old days.When ugly men like David Brinkley could deliver the news.""You remember Brinkley?""Actually, no," she said, laughing."I just remember my mother talking about him." Hiram looked at her appreciatively.Nose not very straight, of course-- but that seemed to be the only thing keeping her off TV.Nice voice.Nice nice face.Body.She put her hand on his thigh."What are you doing tonight?" she asked."Watching television," he grimaced."Really? What do you have?""Sarah Wynn."She squealed in delight."Oh, how wonderful! We must be kindred spirits then! I have Sarah Wynn, too!"Hiram tried to smile."Can I come up to your apartment?"Danger signal.Hand moving up thigh.Invitation to apartment.Sex."No.""Why not?"And Hiram remembered that the only way he could ever get rid of the television was to prove that he wasn't solitary.And fixing up his sex life-- i.e., having one-- would go a long way toward changing their damn profiles."Come, on," he said, and they left the Friends of the Family without further ado.Inside the apartment she immediately took off her shoes and blouse and sat down on the old-fashioned sofa in front of the TV."Oh," she said, "so many books.You really are a profes6or, aren't you?""Yeah," he said, vaguely sensing that the next move was up to him, and not having the faintest idea of what the next move was
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